When you are in a funk?

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When you are in a funk?

Postby LizAnn » Wed Oct 24, 2018 8:50 am

What do you do when you are in a funk? Work wise? Health wise? Mood wise?

I have been in a funk for a while now, I can't really pin point when it started, but I would like to return to my normal self. I am not motivated at work. I haven't worked out in over a MONTH! I am not motivated when I get home. When the kids go to bed, I just want to go to bed too.

Any good tips for getting out of this?
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Re: When you are in a funk?

Postby jennelled » Wed Oct 24, 2018 10:49 am

Oh girl, ME TOO. I haven't worked out since August, I'm in a funk about work, and everything just seems blah. I tried retail therapy but ran up against that pesky ol' budget, ha ha. We've had a couple of date nights lately which certainly helped. It's fun to get all dressed up and go out! They were more than just dinner - we saw Hamilton two weeks ago and last week we went to a charity gala thing with friends.

Lately I've been loving Thanksgiving / holiday magazines (Food Network, Good Housekeeping, Southern Living), along with my old standby of In Style. I try to paint my toenails every other week and my fingernails weekly in fun fall colors. I got a blow out before the gala and it was fabulous! Hallmark starts running Christmas movies on Saturday, so that's awesome. I need to pick out Christmas cards for us, soon. I've been doing a fall outfit challenge which has been interesting - it's through Putting Me Together.

I've also said "yes" to a few weeknight activities for myself. I am doing a monthly book club with some friends, I'm meeting some old coworkers for a HH tomorrow, etc. I hate myself before I have to drag myself to these events, but I'm always SO GLAD I went!
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Re: When you are in a funk?

Postby *K » Mon Oct 29, 2018 10:14 am

I think working out solves a lot. Even if you can't get yourself to do a hardcore workout, can you manage to get in a solo walk (or walk with a friend)? I don't think a walk with kids works quite the same. :)

I don't want a lot of TV but Hallmark movies make me so happy. Can you find something like that to watch? I like this one because you can actually watch with kids!

Funks are hard - nobody can be 100% all of the time.
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Re: When you are in a funk?

Postby happeejen » Mon Oct 29, 2018 11:30 am

Sometimes for me when I'm in a funk at work I know it's time for a vacation. A few days away helps me recharge and not get so annoyed at the small things.

At home, usually making a to-do list of things I want to get done helps motivate me get moving, I find sometimes once I get moving it just helps overall (object in motion stays in motion or something like that :) ) And if I can cross things off the to-do list I feel productive.

Overall though, sometimes funks happen... good luck, it's never fun!
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Re: When you are in a funk?

Postby ame » Tue Oct 30, 2018 12:30 pm

jennelled wrote:Oh girl, ME TOO. I haven't worked out since August, I'm in a funk about work, and everything just seems blah. I tried retail therapy but ran up against that pesky ol' budget, ha ha. We've had a couple of date nights lately which certainly helped. It's fun to get all dressed up and go out! They were more than just dinner - we saw Hamilton two weeks ago and last week we went to a charity gala thing with friends.

Lately I've been loving Thanksgiving / holiday magazines (Food Network, Good Housekeeping, Southern Living), along with my old standby of In Style. I try to paint my toenails every other week and my fingernails weekly in fun fall colors. I got a blow out before the gala and it was fabulous! Hallmark starts running Christmas movies on Saturday, so that's awesome. I need to pick out Christmas cards for us, soon. I've been doing a fall outfit challenge which has been interesting - it's through Putting Me Together.

I've also said "yes" to a few weeknight activities for myself. I am doing a monthly book club with some friends, I'm meeting some old coworkers for a HH tomorrow, etc. I hate myself before I have to drag myself to these events, but I'm always SO GLAD I went!

I DESPISE Hallmark for that. It's not even Halloween and they're taking off my Golden Girls.
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Re: When you are in a funk?

Postby jennelled » Tue Oct 30, 2018 12:53 pm

ame wrote:
jennelled wrote:Hallmark starts running Christmas movies on Saturday, so that's awesome.

I DESPISE Hallmark for that. It's not even Halloween and they're taking off my Golden Girls.

Blasphemy!! (And surely you own a box set, girl!) :tongue:

Feeling better, Liz?

I'm not, lol. I was doing okay until my mom emailed me this afternoon to say she is cutting out Christmas presents for me and Matt this year. She's the only person that buys me nice gifts, or really any gifts (Matt included), and even though she has since rescinded this pronouncement, I'm just really bummed out now. Kind of mourning the family I don't have, I suppose - not in reference to my mom, just the benevolent parents and ILs who lavish their kids with free babysitting and family vacations and nice gifts. Basically, I'm being a brat and I know it. :dontknow:
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Re: When you are in a funk?

Postby LizAnn » Wed Oct 31, 2018 8:43 am

I am feeling a bit better! Today is the end of our fiscal year at work, so I am really hoping to be able to relax a bit this weekend!

Unfortunately, (or maybe fortunately ;) ) we don't have cable, so no Hallmark channel for me! We are a netflix/amazon prime only household. However, there is no lack of television programming on either... :laughing:

We went to dinner with friends last weekend, and went to the pumpkin patch and Grant's Farm with the kiddos. I also ran on Monday night, which was the first time in a LONG time. My one hip has had problems since I was pregnant last, so it is always hard to get back into it. I have been super sore since Monday, but I am hoping to try again tomorrow. I will probably need to after all the candy I consume tonight. ;)

I have just accepted that work is work, and I just have to do my best and hope that is good enough. I tried to go to 80% earlier this year and I was told that we would discuss it at my review in November. I am just having a hard time finding balance right now and I think that is where a lot of this is coming from! I am hopeful I can discuss it at my review and maybe make that change. I am not sure how it would actually look work-wise, and taking such a significant pay cut will suck, but I think it would be worth it.

Jennelle, I hear you on the pity party regarding family! My MIL is the only grandparent my kids have left, and it sucks. She does her best, but she also works and has 3 other grandchildren. I always thought my sister would be an awesome aunt and love my kids, but she rarely even shows up for their stuff. It is a bummer! When my mom was alive, she always bought us really thoughtful gifts, sometimes they were ridiculous, but you knew she spent hours thinking about what she was going to get and trekking through every mall in the area. Every year she would say what your mom said, that she was cutting back that year or she really was just buying for the kids, but she always bought for everyone. Hopefully your mom re-thinks her grinch-y statement. Christmas does get expensive though! I am trying to set a budget and stick to it this year. We always end up going overboard for nieces and nephews, and our own kids...

I am SOO excited for Thanksgiving and Christmas though! Those are my two favorite holidays, so there really is a lot to look forward to! I hope you start to feel better soon Jennelle!
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Re: When you are in a funk?

Postby jennelled » Wed Oct 31, 2018 11:32 am

LizAnn wrote:I am feeling a bit better! Today is the end of our fiscal year at work, so I am really hoping to be able to relax a bit this weekend!

Unfortunately, (or maybe fortunately ;) ) we don't have cable, so no Hallmark channel for me! We are a netflix/amazon prime only household. However, there is no lack of television programming on either... :laughing:

We went to dinner with friends last weekend, and went to the pumpkin patch and Grant's Farm with the kiddos. I also ran on Monday night, which was the first time in a LONG time. My one hip has had problems since I was pregnant last, so it is always hard to get back into it. I have been super sore since Monday, but I am hoping to try again tomorrow. I will probably need to after all the candy I consume tonight. ;)

I have just accepted that work is work, and I just have to do my best and hope that is good enough. I tried to go to 80% earlier this year and I was told that we would discuss it at my review in November. I am just having a hard time finding balance right now and I think that is where a lot of this is coming from! I am hopeful I can discuss it at my review and maybe make that change. I am not sure how it would actually look work-wise, and taking such a significant pay cut will suck, but I think it would be worth it.

Jennelle, I hear you on the pity party regarding family! My MIL is the only grandparent my kids have left, and it sucks. She does her best, but she also works and has 3 other grandchildren. I always thought my sister would be an awesome aunt and love my kids, but she rarely even shows up for their stuff. It is a bummer! When my mom was alive, she always bought us really thoughtful gifts, sometimes they were ridiculous, but you knew she spent hours thinking about what she was going to get and trekking through every mall in the area. Every year she would say what your mom said, that she was cutting back that year or she really was just buying for the kids, but she always bought for everyone. Hopefully your mom re-thinks her grinch-y statement. Christmas does get expensive though! I am trying to set a budget and stick to it this year. We always end up going overboard for nieces and nephews, and our own kids...

I am SOO excited for Thanksgiving and Christmas though! Those are my two favorite holidays, so there really is a lot to look forward to! I hope you start to feel better soon Jennelle!

I'd love to hear how the 80% convo goes. I have always gotten the impression you end up doing most of your work and just taking a pay cut. :(

I told her I'd be sad if she didn't buy me a gift and she immediately backtracked and told me I'm the only one that buys her a gift, so she gets it. Which made me even sadder (for her)! Thanks for getting what I was saying...I said something similar to my husband, and he immediately started a) defending his parents and b) complaining about mine. I really wasn't complaining about our parents specifically, just the idea of richer, more awesome parents? Anyway, you get what I meant, so thank you!
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Re: When you are in a funk?

Postby LizAnn » Wed Oct 31, 2018 11:51 am

jennelled wrote:I'd love to hear how the 80% convo goes. I have always gotten the impression you end up doing most of your work and just taking a pay cut. :(

I told her I'd be sad if she didn't buy me a gift and she immediately backtracked and told me I'm the only one that buys her a gift, so she gets it. Which made me even sadder (for her)! Thanks for getting what I was saying...I said something similar to my husband, and he immediately started a) defending his parents and b) complaining about mine. I really wasn't complaining about our parents specifically, just the idea of richer, more awesome parents? Anyway, you get what I meant, so thank you!


In my situation I have a billable hour requirement, so it would actually reduce my billable hours to 80% of what is required now. While I know that I will likely spend the same amount of time in the office, I think it would reduce the stress I have around fulfilling that requirement. However, on the other hand, I think you are correct. I would definitely still be required to do the basic things that are required of everyone and don't count toward billable hours such as firm meetings, groups meetings, presentations. I think your take is why my chair was hesitant to jump on it though. I will let you know if it moves forward.

Good for you for being honest with your mom! That helps so much! Honestly, maybe tell her to only buy for you and the girls and not Matt if she is trying to cut down on gifts. He probably doesn't care anyway. I totally get what you are saying, it would be nice to have a wealthy parent or grandparent take us on vacation or a retired one to help us with child care. I think it is ok to complain about that! I complain about my friends who complain about their parents watching their kids... I don't want to hear how frustrated you are that your parents are spoiling your children... :laughing: My husband and I talk about how we hope to be able to be those parents/grandparents when we are older. Spoiling grandkids is going to be the best! :yahoo: Obviously, that is a LONG way off, but still kind of a fun thing to envision.
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Re: When you are in a funk?

Postby *K » Mon Nov 05, 2018 10:23 am

LizAnn wrote:
jennelled wrote:I'd love to hear how the 80% convo goes. I have always gotten the impression you end up doing most of your work and just taking a pay cut. :(

I told her I'd be sad if she didn't buy me a gift and she immediately backtracked and told me I'm the only one that buys her a gift, so she gets it. Which made me even sadder (for her)! Thanks for getting what I was saying...I said something similar to my husband, and he immediately started a) defending his parents and b) complaining about mine. I really wasn't complaining about our parents specifically, just the idea of richer, more awesome parents? Anyway, you get what I meant, so thank you!


In my situation I have a billable hour requirement, so it would actually reduce my billable hours to 80% of what is required now. While I know that I will likely spend the same amount of time in the office, I think it would reduce the stress I have around fulfilling that requirement. However, on the other hand, I think you are correct. I would definitely still be required to do the basic things that are required of everyone and don't count toward billable hours such as firm meetings, groups meetings, presentations. I think your take is why my chair was hesitant to jump on it though. I will let you know if it moves forward.

Good for you for being honest with your mom! That helps so much! Honestly, maybe tell her to only buy for you and the girls and not Matt if she is trying to cut down on gifts. He probably doesn't care anyway. I totally get what you are saying, it would be nice to have a wealthy parent or grandparent take us on vacation or a retired one to help us with child care. I think it is ok to complain about that! I complain about my friends who complain about their parents watching their kids... I don't want to hear how frustrated you are that your parents are spoiling your children... :laughing: My husband and I talk about how we hope to be able to be those parents/grandparents when we are older. Spoiling grandkids is going to be the best! :yahoo: Obviously, that is a LONG way off, but still kind of a fun thing to envision.


I have friends that have done flex schedules at a big 4, which is similar with billable goals (though not quite as directly tied to compensation). They tend to be on/off and I am honestly never sure if they are on it or not. Nobody is going to tell you to work less so if you do decide to 80%, I think you have to do your best to establish rules and try to stick with them without making accommodations. For me, I started working from home two days per week and it has been really awesome. I love it for a lot of reasons.

Jennelle, I totally get the present thing. I would be bummed and would also be a total brat about it. I think the key is admitting that. ;)
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